Angels, Coaching and Self-Coaching Exercise

By AC / The Relax Coach

After many years doing training for big companies and based on my experience helping individuals with their stress in China, I started to realized many things that can be helpful for many many people, not only in China but around the world. That’s why I started to share and write articles about this, my experience and the lives of all the people I have been meeting so far in this life.

Before we go to the Self Coaching Exercise, I will like to share some concepts we need to understand, just to have a better background for the exercise.

THE FANTASY WORLD

Most of us are living in an illusion. Since we where kids we started to be conditioned by other people’s lives, beliefs, and way of thinking.  A lot of people today is still there in this illusion, blind without direction in life; emotionally attached to material things and relationships. This kind of life is what bring you high levels of stress, inner struggle, and real pain.  But this is not your final destination, you have a choice.

WARNING: This article is only for those who want to go out from this illusion, from this fantasy world, and move to a new world, a real one created by you.

THE ANGELS

Fortunately, on the way of our journey, we will meet wonderful people that will bring us a message, those are what I call ANGELS.

The message they bring can be a subtle advice or a big warning, somehow, they come to guide us. They can be anybody, can be your own family member, your friend, even a stranger that you meet on the subway or your dog. Can be a little confusing who to listen and who not to.

 

THE COACHES

At the same time, there are many people that passed through the pains you are facing now. People that woke up a long time ago from the limiting beliefs and old society patterns before you.  Some of them learned and experienced enough to guide others to a better path of life. Those are what I call COACHES.

THE COACHES are those who can help you to see what you can’t see.  

 

SELF-COACHING

If you are not open to receive the messages from ANGELS, or maybe doesn’t feel a COACH can help you now, I understand. Maybe is not your time yet. The same happened to me and millions of people that have been experiencing what we call THE AWAKENING. This awakening is just an AHA moment when you deeply realize that life can be better for you and with determination, you say NO MORE TO THE SHIT AND PAIN you have been experiencing in your life.

And life will bring you pain and struggle anyway. Is part of the game design. But if you are still lost without direction, conditioned and attached, this pain and struggle can come to you in extraordinary levels. We don’t want that.

HERE SOMETHING YOU CAN DO:  3 STEPS SELF-COACHING EXERCISE

If you are ready to change this situation and reconnect with your life direction and purpose, here I will recommend you 3 simple steps to start with, this worked for me in many ways, hope it can work for you too.  You need only 2 pieces of A4 paper and a pen or marker. If you like many colors like me, get some colorful markers.

VERY IMPORTANT: To do this exercise and experience better results, take a moment for yourself, quality time, in silence, far from the stressful and noisy environment.

Get the first piece of paper and write down about YOU in present time. You can use the following questions as a reference:

• Who are you now?
• What are you now?
• How is your career now?
• Where are you?
• What do you have?
• How do you feel about who are you?
• How do you feel about what you have?
• Who is around you in your life?
• How do you feel about them?
• What are your achievements until this point of life?
• What kind of knowledge have you now learned from your past failures?
• Any projects in mind?

All these questions are focused on the present time. Anything that comes to your mind, positive or negative, Write it there.  Just let your hands express your soul and feelings. Write and write until you feel is enough.

After you finish writing the list of things about your life in present time (POINT A), identify and mark what can be better for you. Just mark them with a star*. Forget about what other people say about your life, this is your time, your life!

Then, in the second piece of paper, write down about these items with the star that you consider can be better. You can use this questions as a reference for step 2.

• What can be better?
• What is the desired result?
• When I see/feel/want this result to become real?

 

Maybe you will experience some pain, struggles or blocks while you are writing this. Just take a deep breath, accept it and continue. This uncomfortable feeling IS NOT YOU, is just your mind playing some old tricks. There is something you may need to work on later. Maybe you don’t know how now, but at least you can see it clearer where you can start and where you want to go.  (A—B)

Now you have 2 outcomes. POINT A with your situation at present time; POINT B with a desirable result or destination.

After you have more information about your life and see clearly the things you want, check about why they are happening. What the root is. How you can transform and close the gap between A and B.

IMPORTANT: For the purpose of this exercise, don’t expend too much time on thinking and writing about how to close the gap. This exercise is only to provide you a brief idea of your situation at present time. Later, if you really want to do something about them, you will need to invest more time in it.

Clearing out the uncertainties, the questions marks of your life, help you to reduce the fears and obstacles created by these pains and increase the probability to achieve what you want. Be patient.

One common example of what I saw on my clients and one of the biggest pains that we have been creating to ourselves is the limiting belief: I am not good enough.

If we follow these 3 steps using some examples related to this I am not good enough, we may find this:

1- Evaluate your life in present time (POINT A)

Who are you now? – I am a single mother (talking about role)

 

2- Identify what can be better (POINT B)

I am not a good mother so I want to be a better mom for my son, but I don’t know how.

 

3- Clear out the doubts and whys (closing the gap)

There is a gap now from PRESENT SINGLE MOM ROLE (A) to a future BETTER MOM ROLE (B).  Is time to learn about how to be a better mom. Then, in coaching, is very important you define in detail what it means to you this “future role” of been a BETTER MOM using this example. Then you will be able to find more easy and effortless the necessary information and support for your growth and become the wonderful mom you want to be.

 

Another example:

1- Evaluate your life in present time (POINT A)

I am an office worker and I hate my job, is horrible (talking about a career)

 

2- Identify what can be better (POINT B)

I want to find the perfect job, something I love, but I’m not sure what

 

3- Clear out the doubts and whys (closing the gap)

There is a gap now, from PRESENT HORRIBLE JOB to a future PERFECT JOB.  Is time to learn about how to change this. Then, again, define on detail what it means to you this “PERFECT JOB” then see what skills and talents you have, what you need to improve, and where you can find this job.

The limiting beliefs connected to I am not good enough is very common.  I will write down another article only about this.  For now, what I can say is, YES, you are not good enough…YET!   😉

 

This exercise is just one way to put yourself back on track, on the way to the life you really want to experience. There is also important to mention that from POINT A to POINT B there will be many obstacles and most of the time these obstacles are only in our minds.

If you are doing this by yourself, you may take more time to clearly see this POINT A, POINT B, how to close the gap and how to overcome obstacles. If you join a training or workshop about this or related to what you want to achieve, the probability you will do it faster is higher. Same or even more effective, if you find a coach to help you. But doesn’t matter how or when you start this process, start with yourself and do it now! Life is short and juicy.

 

A FINAL RECOMMENDATION

For those who are new to the coaching services and looking for a coach, like in any profession or industry, there are good service providers, poor service providers, outstanding service providers. Once you find somebody, you must feel and see how much resonance you have with this person. Meet or talk to him, see how his life is, what has he been through, what he knows, his skills and experience. There is not a perfect coach, but for sure there are many that have a real mission to support people and they will bring all their best resources to support you.

 

You are a wonderful person!  You are complete!  You have everything you need to succeed right there inside you.  The only thing is you may be a little lost and confused by all the mess around you. That’s all. Take a deep breath, find the way and allow yourself to embrace the beautiful life you deserve.

 

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Angelo Castagneto (AC): The Relax Coach

Music Therapist, Corporate Trainer, Stress Management Coach, Public Speaker, Writer,  Sculptor

For more about us please visit: http://www.angelocastagneto.com